Print Reading Group Guide

In Muffins and Mayhem, Suzanne Beecher, creator of DearReader.com, combines her life stories with 30 of her favorite recipes. With striking candor, Suzanne takes readers on a journey from her lowest moments to her greatest joys and personal victories. Suzanne writes about personal successes and failures and what each taught her about life, love, and her capacity to persevere.

Scattered throughout Suzanne’s memoir are favorite recipes, and each is accompanied by a personal anecdote. Suzanne believes that recipes are more than just a mix of ingredients: They’re food for the soul, and she doesn’t leave readers hungry. From humorous tales about avoiding her mother’s liver dishes as a child (and Mom’s Thanksgiving meals as an adult!) to a reverent account of how a childhood hero touched her life through Frosted Meat Loaf, Suzanne ’s food-filled memoir warms the heart as well as fills the stomach.

For Discussion

1. In “Pretending My Way to Success,” Suzanne writes, “ . . . when you have to convince people you’re in charge, it doesn’t work” (page 46). Her solution was to change the way she dressed in order to change the way others perceived her. The result was an inner self-confidence that eventually led her to shed the “power suit” without losing any authority. Do you agree with Suzanne’s belief that clothes can, in a sense, make the person? Have you ever had a similar experience where your outward appearance caused an inner metamorphosis?

2. In chapter one, Suzanne writes about her mother’s “truths” and quirks and how, despite her best efforts, every now and then when she looks in the mirror she sees her mother looking back. Is adopting some of our parents’ idiosyncrasies inevitable? Why or why not?

3. From failed marriages to unsuccessful business ventures, Suzanne journeys through many “live and learn” experiences. Even situations such as her restaurant folding ultimately lead to personal growth and insight. Would you consider her unsuccessful endeavors failures? Why or why not? How do you define failure? Did any of Suzanne ’s stories make you reconsider the value of some of the failures in your own life?

4. There’s an old adage: “Dance like no one’s watching and sing like no one’s listening.” In the story about Suzanne’s hotel room performance of Irene Cara’s “Flashdance (What a Feeling),” she does just that—except she accidentally winds up with an audience. Have you ever experienced a similar situation? Was it comical like Suzanne’s, or more embarrassing?

5. When describing her own quirky personality, Suzanne quotes Leonard Cohen’s “There’s a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” How do you think Suzanne’s embracing of her individuality and pride in being “a little strange” (page 74) has affected the way she interacts with others? How can embracing one’s uniqueness help overcome life ’s obstacles?

6. An illness or injury can be one of life ’s biggest setbacks. Suzanne experienced such a setback when she was diagnosed with benign essential blepharospasm, a rare, incurable neurological disorder. Determined to overcome her disability, Suzanne learned to love her illness in order to live with it. Do you think her “love the illness” strategy could help others suffering from chronic conditions? Have you ever experienced a similar situation? If so, how did you learn to live with your condition?

7. In talking about the meaning of life, Suzanne writes, “I’ve always thought my job, my purpose here on earth, certainly must be something more dramatic than simply loving and taking care of the people around me. So I’ve strived to be clever, artistic, and talented in business. But . . . I realize I’ve been looking at life all wrong. It’s not complicated, there ’s nothing to prove. My mother was right. It’s really very simple. What’s really important is love.” Do you agree? Why or why not?

8. After her mom passed away, Suzanne discovered a short poem that her grandmother had given to her mother. The poem is just a silly anti-theft ditty written on an index card, but she cherishes the keepsake and makes an index card of her own because, as she says, “Sometimes a little bit of silliness is the recipe I need to get me through the day” (pages 78–79). Of all the values Suzanne carries, why do you think maintaining a sense of humor is so important? Are there any special pick-me-up tokens or rituals in your life that you use to help you through rough patches?

9. One of the book’s main themes is family traditions. Holiday traditions are particularly important to Suzanne, so much so that she has trouble parting with antiquated rituals like buying pecan pies at Christmas. She also recognizes the importance of maintaining traditions now that she ’s responsible for holiday dinners. How important is tradition in your family? Did you experience a similar “passing of the torch” when you became an adult?

10. For a long time Suzanne was ambivalent about going home to visit her parents, even to the point of becoming physically ill. But through Mrs. Creswick’s meat loaf and other recipes and stories from her recipe box, Suzanne discovered a way to go back home. What does going home mean to you? Has it been an easy journey or, like Suzanne, have you had to find a way to give yourself the home you never had when you were growing up?

11. Suzanne recounts the day when she was sitting in Starbucks and a man came over to her table and asked, “Are you a writer” (page 224)? After stumbling through an awkward and embarrassing response, Suzanne realized it was finally time to face her moment of truth. Was she going to accept and acknowledge her writing talent, or let self-doubt continue to steal it away? The words in an old folk song proclaim, “This little light of mine, I’m going to let it shine.” Have you been able to freely acknowledge the talents you’ve been blessed with, or do you hide your light under a bushel?

12. Toward the end of the book, Suzanne writes about having the courage to “deviate from my comfortable routine” in order to discover new opportunities to touch other people’s lives (page 216). So many of her projects required her to trust her instincts and take a chance. For example, when she took it upon herself to essentially create her own job description at Sunny Hill Nursing Home. Have you ever found yourself in situations where you had an opportunity to take similar chances, and how did you react? Do you regret your decision?

1. Plan a book club smorgasbord! Have everyone prepare his or her favorite recipe either from the book or from Suzanne’s recipe blog (DearReader.com) and bring it to your book club meeting. Or prepare one of your family’s favorite recipes and share the story behind it.

2. One of the most inspiring experiences Suzanne writes about is her role as volunteer coordinator. Give back to your own community by volunteering in your neighborhood.

3. Visit the author’s website, DearReader.com, and see firsthand how Suzanne’s free online book clubs work!

4. Visit Suzanne’s website MuffinsandMayhem.com, and create a cookbook of recipes and stories with your reading group or family members, or make one for yourself.